Housewife Theologian

The Gospel Interrupting the Ordinary

Burnout

Written By: Aimee Byrd - Apr• 01•13

9781596386624Brad Hambrick, Burnout (P&R, 2013)

Like every other morning, I awoke at 6 o’clock to write and study. By 7:00, it was time to rotate to my next usual station, performing the talented task of making breakfasts and lunches simultaneously. Only this time it is Saturday, so my girls are sleeping in and I am only making one lunch for my husband. I send him off to his second job, working for my dad as a landscaper, as we make a plan to meet up at my mom’s by 5:00 for our first round of Easter dinners. Okay. Maybe I have some more writing time I can squeeze in before making my two Martha Stewart crispy coconut chocolate pies, utilizing my new Pinterest tip of baking the eggs we are going to dye later, and getting my daughter ready for softball practice by 11:00. I was too ambitious. I had all of five minutes to get dressed while barking orders at my children, pouring boiling heavy whipping cream over baking chocolate, and giving my daughter the perfect ponytail for practice. Somehow I missed the memo that the practice was going to be held at a local church instead of our usual place. I drove to the wrong field, making us 15 minutes late.

Pulling up to the new location, I remember that this field doesn’t have any bleachers or picnic tables and I didn’t bring a chair. But, we finally have a sunny day in the 50’s. So I backed the Traverse up, folded the back seats down, and hopped in the back with the trunk door open. Then I desperately whipped out my copy of Burnout! This two-hour break has provided a great refreshment before I return to the messy kitchen I left, Easter egg dying, a workout, and trying to make sure my kids are presentable for Mimi’s house.

I fear burnout. I love life, and I don’t ever want my passions to quell. But I’m also painfully aware of the prayer my husband and I prayed together as the month of April was approaching. “Lord, we are blessed with so many wonderful opportunities, that it is overwhelming. Help us not to say yes to more things than we can handle.” Hambrick reminds us that “Every good opportunity is not from God or, at least, is not necessarily God’s will for your life” (Loc. 69). Those of us who are energized to take on all the wonderful opportunities in life are more susceptible to burnout as well. “Those who are not passionate about life do not experience burnout” (63).

The author helps us to distinguish the motives behind all of our “yeses.”  “Part of submitting to God’s lordship over our life is to live within the limitations with which he created us” (Loc. 144). This statement was a bit revolutionary for me. It revealed my rebellious heart in trying to do more than God has created me for. Now that I am sitting in the back of my car rereading my notes and typing this, I am even more impacted by this truth. And it ties so well to the gospel solution to burnout that I read at the end of this book today. Because Christ is seated at the right hand of the Father, “we can have restful hearts in the midst of our service to him” (Loc. 466). Hambrick also provides many other motives behind our endeavors that I encourage you to read for yourself. I was convicted by several.

There is a wealth of practical advice in this short read. While we have sinful motives behind the sin of our over-performance problem, there are also necessary time management skills that can equip us with pulling off our commitments. “Burnout is the result of living beyond our means with the time God has provided” (Loc. 110). Hambrick devotes a good portion of the book to teaching the reader about a “time budget.” Budgeting your time is a lot like budgeting your money, and you need to be intentional about how you will spend.

Many will benefit from this section. There is much wisdom in it. However, I will have to admit that I am not one who thrives off of this precise budgeting. It actually zaps my joy. This is the same reason I don’t count calories. Looking at my time all mapped out for me makes me feel like I have already lived it all, and like I’m imprisoned to the calendar. Both time budgets and planned dieting are wonderfully advantageous for many, but they actually make me want to rebel more. When the author begins rationing the amount of hours we should devote to sleep, work, family, service, recreation, and the like, I do agree with the categories for the time budget and see how the principles are biblical. But I am definitely thankful for his footnote that some will only use these as a general parameter. The numbers provoke rebellion in me. When he recommends 50 hours of sleep per week, I want to say I can do it in 45.

I think Hambrick recognizes this propensity when he says later in the book, “Practical writings have a strong tendency to only reinforce burnout,” recognizing his own helpful book will do just this if we take it as “do more get better” and not grasp his greater message of gospel application. I was glad that he added this important part, and think it may have done well for him to introduce the practical section with this disclaimer.

The whole book has benefited me in that Hambrick has covered all the bases. My awareness has been raised, my sin exposed, I have found respite in the gospel, and I am encouraged and equipped to move on. And would you believe that I budgeted this joyful experience of reflection and review precisely to the last minute of softball practice? Time to praise my girl for her awesome skill and hard work in practice, and take her home to dye Easter eggs…renewed and with joy.

 

*Thanks to Netgalley for supplying this copy of Burnout in exchange for an honest review

Posted in Book Reviews , , | 19 Comments »

Did Luke Write Hebrews?

Written By: Aimee Byrd - Mar• 27•13

images-1David L. Allen, Lukan Authorship of Hebrews (B&H, 2010)

Well, he had me by page 31. Of course, I want it to be true. A while back ago, I wrote an article about my top three questions I have when I get to heaven. What I only hinted at then is my cockamamie housewife theologian theory. I was too embarrassed. But now, thanks to David Allen, I am going loud and proud.

You see, after teaching Hebrews for the last year (or so), I couldn’t shake the suspicion that we were getting something very similar to the “explanation” Jesus gave to the two disciples on the way to Emmaus. What if the mystery disciple on the road to Emmaus was also the writer to the Hebrews? Although it’s merely a theory, some people believe the unnamed disciple to be Luke. Allen gives us much more than a theory on the writer of Hebrews. He gives us a polite scholarly smack down. And even if Luke wasn’t the unnamed disciple, he is the one who gives us the most detailed account of the Emmaus event, showing a knowledge and interest in this amazing exposition Jesus gave about how all the Scriptures pointed to and found their fulfillment in him. Just saying.

But let’s move on to this wonderful, well-written book. I doubt Allen had housewife theologians in mind when he wrote this almost 400 page, scholarly hardback. And I can only review it as an inquiring lay person. When he is breaking down Greek phrases, along with the use of Greek present tense form, well, I kind of have to take his word for it. But, without sacrificing the academic integrity of his work, Allen has written accessibly enough for an interested lay person such as myself. If there are any smarticle people who are reading this post, I’m sure you will benefit from Allen’s work much more than I did, but I am very grateful for the education it gave me.

I have a whole new appreciation for Luke—doctor, historian, and linguistic master. “Both Luke and the author of Hebrews are described by most New Testament scholars as the most literary writers of the New Testament” (139). A writer would do well just studying the prologues of Luke, Acts, and Hebrews. Luke is doing so much more than telling a story in his Luke-Acts narratives. Both Luke and the writer of Hebrews reveal a masterful use of the Septuagint. And although the genres are different, Luke seems to have a sermon peppered through his narrative. Luke’s purpose to writing to Theophilus in his two-volume work seems to be the same as the sermon to the Hebrews: to motivate him to persevere in the faith by explaining how “Christianity is the fulfillment of the Old Testament hope of Israel” (176).

One thing about this book that really impressed me is the tone. It’s easier to read a scholarly work when the passion of the author is apparent. It’s inspiring. And yet, Allen doesn’t let this passion take the front seat. He “plays the ball” of the argument, and gives both opposing and supporting scholarly arguments their playing time. In interacting with the opposition, he doesn’t discredit the people, he takes their work seriously and even concedes to other possibilities. Allen is confident enough in his work to reveal the solid evidence, be honest about the educated guesses, as well as reveal which arguments are based more on creativity and possibilities rather than absolute certainty. By doing this, he gets 1,000 more credibility points. It also stimulates the reader to use Allen’s research to think for themselves.

So what are his arguments for the case of Lukan authorship of Hebrews? Totally Awesome. Ahem, I mean, they are historical (yep, some fellers in the early church suspected Luke), linguistic (“lexical, stylistic, and textlinguistic evidence), theological, and, drum roll…pretty darn convincing that Luke was in fact a Jew, and not the Gentile that modern scholars have made him out to be. Allen also looks at the main candidates for Hebrew’s authorship (with the presupposition of the Holy Spirit’s inspiration) like Paul, Barnabas, and Apollos, and highlights where they are wanting. It’s a pretty exciting read for theological dorks like me. Some parts were amazingly convincing, like the chiastic framework of all three books, the similarities in their prologues, the use of vocabulary, and the comparison of Acts 7 and Hebrews 11. I also found Allen’s notion on the identity of Theophilus and the recipients of Hebrews as converted high priests to be quite interesting. The historical reconstruction that he gives at the end of the book is also conceivable.

Whether one agrees with Allen’s conclusions or not, they will definitely have to wrestle with his work. He has thrown a respectable pitch into the discussion and wondrous study regarding the writer to the masterpiece of Hebrews. I’m happily persuaded, especially with my underlying, biased theory. And although we will probably not know the identity of this writer with 100% surety in this life, I have just learned a wealth of information from Allen in the process of discovery.

Posted in Book Reviews , , | 9 Comments »

The One, True Story

Written By: Aimee Byrd - Mar• 25•13

My friend Dana is on a roll. Not even two weeks after writing her wonderful article, The Wine Kitchen, she submitted this article about her struggle with the word Easter. So enjoy my new Housewife Theologian guest blogger, Dana Tuttle, once more!:

Easter IshtarAh, Easter…bunnies, chocolate, jelly beans, and eggs. I have wonderful childhood memories of Easter, and I share those same traditions with my children. I am a sucker for a holiday and this crazy theme mom is currently planning a spring tea party for the kids in our neighborhood.

The word Easter just doesn’t sit right with me, though. Each year that I am confronted with it, I find myself looking into its meaning. I was aware of some Christians who refrain from using the term and strictly call it Resurrection Day. But really, that can still have several meanings. The season of spring in itself contains a theme of resurrection. Flowers bloom from trees that were barren and the brown grass begins to turn green as the sun warms the earth. Also, in ancient pagan legends there are several themes of deities being resurrected. Are we really changing the meaning by calling it Resurrection Day?

Curious, I began to do some research on the word Easter. What does it mean? How did it become part of our culture? I knew that it has its roots in a pagan fertility goddess, but who was this gal that was stealing the show? I found that the information on the internet and the “rabbit trails” were overwhelming. She is a legend after all, and it was hard to pinpoint an exact document that spoke of her. This goddess and her story has branched off and spread into almost every civilization in the world!

I narrowed my search to the legend of Semiramis, the queen of Babylon and Assyria. Legend has it that she deified herself, her husband, and her son. In some stories she even marries her son as her resurrected husband. As the myth is told in some cultures, her son was conceived supernaturally and was resurrected after death. It sounds so similar to the story of Christ. How is it that our own redemptive story sounds similar to a pagan legend from centuries before Christ’s birth? It is because the one, true story rings throughout history. It’s the story that has been on the hearts of all mankind from the beginning. We know that we are created beings and an intelligent designer created us. We are aware of our mortality and we know that we are sinful. As civilizations have proved over and over, we are aware that we need a Savior.

I have never been one to have faith in faith. I want my faith in facts. I want what I believe to be based on historical events. I have a great respect for Christians like Josh McDowell and Lee Strobel ,who are both lawyers who set out to disprove Christianity by putting it on trial. Both of these educated men converted to Christianity based on the overwhelming historical evidence. We can also be assured of the authenticity of Scripture based on archeological findings. I love how Hank Hanegraaff compiled all this information for us in his book, “Has God Spoken?” For me, these are the kinds of books I need. Show me where it is true. I am an apologist at heart and I love having historical backup.

Having a love for history and the truth, I began to unpack the mystery of this goddess. Ishtar is the goddess of fertility in the Babylonian and Assyrian empires. This is most likely who queen Semiramis was deified into. Eostre is the goddess in German pagan culture.  Not surprisingly, the English called her Eastre. As so, she infiltrated greatly into European culture. The scriptures refer to her as the fertility goddess, Asharoth. Scripture is not quiet about her. She is mentioned in Judges 2:11-13, 1 Samuel 7:3-4, 1 Kings 11:1-8, and Revelation chapters 17 and 18.

My concern is for my children. I want them to know history, truth, and culture. I want them to know the one true story, the story of good and evil, the story of redemption. Whether they are confronted with Semiramis and her son, or the Harry Potter series, I want them to recognize the strands of  truth that are woven throughout culture.

I am thankful for C.S. Lewis, a professor of Greek Mythology who converted to Christianity. With him, we have both sides of the coin. In his book, God in the Dock, he says “The heart of Christianity is a myth which is also a fact. The old myth of the Dying God, without ceasing to be myth comes down from the heaven of legend and imagination to the earth of history. It happens at a particular date, in a particular place, followed by definable historical consequences. We pass from a Balder or a Osiris, dying nobody knows when or where, to a historical person crucified under Pontius Pilate. By becoming fact, it does not cease to be myth: that is the miracle.”

We read in 1 Corinthians 8:4-6 where Paul says concerning idols, “…we know that an idol has no real existence and that there is no God but one. For although there may be so-called gods in heaven or on earth-as indeed there are many ‘gods’ and many ‘lords’–yet for there is one God, the Father from whom are all things and for whom we exist and one Lord, Jesus Christ, through whom are all things and through whom we exist.” With the confidence of Scripture and the freedom that my Savior Jesus Christ provided on the cross, my children will wake up Easter morning to a basket of goodies. And then I will tell them the one, true story.

Posted in Guest Bloggers , , , , | 16 Comments »

Why Christians Are Sometimes Annoying

Written By: Aimee Byrd - Mar• 22•13

progressive_soupFor the same reason that atheists are, we talk about God too much.

For some cockamamie reason, I don’t have a “Housewife Theologian” Facebook page. I know it’s not the smartest (non)move, but it fits in the same category for why I never joined a sorority—I don’t feel the need to ask people to like me. But I do share a link to my recent articles on my personal page. I have plenty of friends who aren’t Christians, as well as those who just don’t care to see yet another post talking about God every other day. Since I care too much about what other people think, I worry that I am annoying my Facebook “friendies” by dropping yet another post about God in their news feed.

Some Christians really are annoying about it. Every other word out of their mouth is “the good Lord” this and “God bless” that. After a couple of minutes you realize that they may have a colorful God veneer, but all that’s underneath is particle board. That’s a real shame.

And yet, we really should be obsessed with God. The preacher to the Hebrews says so. The first chapter division introduces the sermon with the supremacy of Christ. In just the first three verses we learn that he is the ultimate prophet, heir of all things, and the radiance of God’s glory. To take it up a notch, the sermon continues to explain that Christ isn’t only better than the prophets, but he is also better than the angels. If angels delivered a message to us, we would think it to be pretty important. What does our final messenger indicate about the value of the message?

So we see the preacher urging the listener in Hebrews 2:1, “Therefore we must pay much closer attention to what we have heard, lest we drift away from it.” I don’t think our English translation delivers the punch that this warning section is delivering. The New King James version gives us a bit of a stronger exhortation, saying we “must give the more earnest heed to the things we have heard.”

Looking up “earnest” in my Strongs Concordance I find words like, “more superabundantly,” and “exceedingly.” And for “heed” I find, “to hold to the mind,” and “apply oneself.” The preacher is pressing the reader with an argument from the lesser to the greater. While they payed such close attention to the message delivered by the angels to Moses, how much more should they cling to the Word spoken by the Son in these last days! And as we hear this Word today, we also should hold tight to this message. The warning is that if we don’t, we will not persevere.

In fact, just about every imperative to persevere in Hebrews is similar. The preacher tells us over and over to hold fast to the confession of our hope.

So we do need to be a little crazy about the truth. And it can really be annoying to those who do not recognize the message that delivers Christ. Interestingly, those that flat-out deny the truth also become preoccupied with it. Professing atheists can get annoying with their obsession that there is not God. If there is no God, why are they obsessed with our confessions? Why do they talk about God so much? I guess they are trying not to fall away from their disbelief.

But what about all those “lukewarm” Christians who don’t want to over-think things? They’re like Spongebob and Patrick when they discovered a humongous pearl. They knew it was special and beautiful, so they carried it around with them. I think they ended up playing a mean game of volleyball with it. But since they weren’t knowledgeable about the pearl, they couldn’t really appreciate its value. Lukewarm Christians are in danger of falling away.

And so are the ones who annoy us with the dazzling God talk that overlays the particle board. We aren’t to be obsessed with the word, “God,” or even with making sure others know we are Christians. We are to be fixated with the message of salvation that we have heard. This means that we need to sit ourselves under the preached Word and partake in the sacraments that God has given as a means to confer Christ’s blessing to us. This message points us to the only One worthy of our worship, our ultimate reward, Jesus Christ.

We are not all speaking of the same thing when we use the word “God.” The gospel message of salvation points to the one, true God. It provides the narrow gate that we are told to enter. “For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few” (Matt 7:13-14). That’s why I am superabundantly engaged in the message that I’ve heard. It tells us about the gate, the one Mediator whereby we can approach our God. And that is why I want others to hear it too. So let’s not try to change the message to make us less annoying, and let us make sure that we know what that message is.

Posted in Knowing God , , , | 11 Comments »

You Are the Man!

Written By: Aimee Byrd - Mar• 20•13

images-1This is usually a positive statement, but it didn’t turn out that way for David. I’m sure you are familiar with the clever confrontation Nathan the prophet had with Kind David in 2 Samuel 12:1-15. I’ve been reflecting on it this week. First of all, there’s a little history. We see Nathan introduced earlier in chapter 7, where David approaches him, and Nathan is able to give David a very positive word from God. So we see a good relationship already established before Nathan has to later confront David about his adultery and murderous sins.

Second, I see wisdom. Nathan approaches David with a story about two men, one rich and one poor. As he weaves his tale about how the rich man with an abundance of flocks and herds takes the one, precious lamb that the poor man owned as a family pet to feed his guest, Nathan adds some foreshadowing. When he says that this precious lamb is like a daughter to the poor man, the Hebrew for “daughter,” which actually ends the sentence, is also the first syllable for the name “Bathsheba.”  Of course, David doesn’t notice because he is still blinded by his sin.

It’s interesting how God doesn’t put any velvet in the mouths of his prophets. We are so careful about sandwiching our critiques between buttery compliments, but Nathan’s word from God has thorns all over it. When David emphatically says that this evil rich man deserves to die, he is unknowingly condemning himself. Nathan then shows his cards with the pronouncement, “You are the man!” And then he just lets it roll with condemnation and the consequential penalties. Even still, after the thorns, grace is shown to David as Nathan tells him that the Lord has “put away” his sin, and he will not die.

David’s response reveals the effectiveness of God’s Word to him. He immediately repents recognizing that first and foremost, he has sinned against the Lord. We read of this encounter and we wonder, would we respond the same? David was a powerful king with many riches, and was certainly overcome with lust. But God’s Word prevailed over him. At this moment, the proper value of life, power, family, and possessions were put back into place. When Nathan tells David, “You are the man!” do we hear the condemning echo? “You are the man, and you are the man, and you are the man!”

Also, we may wonder if we are faithful to God’s Word enough to take the velvet out of our own mouths when a friend is caught in sin. Or do we let fear rule our hearts? Complacency? Do we even have established relationships that give us the trust to talk to someone’s conscience? Do we pray for wisdom on how to address the issue, or do we just throw Scripture in their face? We might not be prophets in the same sense as Nathan, but we do have a loving responsibility to encourage and exhort one another in the Word. And we have the written revelation of God’s Word to us by the final Prophet (Heb. 1:1-3).

But, we don’t. Not as we should. We all condemn ourselves, just like David.

As I was sitting under the preached Word this Sunday, my reflections on David and Nathan came spearing back to me as I heard my pastor preach on the betrayal and arrest of Jesus. What is amazing is that the innocent, holy, Jesus Christ condemned himself to the death David and the rest of us deserved by doing what David or we couldn’t do–identifying himself. Instead of a Nathan, Jesus had some sleepy disciples and a Judas. As his betrayer leads a whole band of soldiers, chief priests, and Pharisees with weapons toward Jesus, they don’t find a dangerous, defensive opponent. The unarmed Christ approaches them, asking who they seek. They are looking for Jesus the Nazarene, the man. And then he said the very words that we could not say, “I am.” This revelation of himself caused the angry crowd to fall back to the ground. And although his words, as the Ego eimi, condemned them all to death (John 8:24), the holy Son of God then took on himself my sin, your sin, and all of the sin of everyone his Father entrusted to him, straight to the cross. Because of this, David, and me, and you, can actually have eyes to see that we are the man, and he is the great I am.

Posted in Knowing God , , , , | 4 Comments »

Opening the Door

Written By: Aimee Byrd - Mar• 18•13
That's *Byrds

That’s *Byrds

Sometimes when I push the “publish” button I’m even more scared than usual. Even though my last article was about caring too much about what other people think, I find myself still worried that I’m going to offend someone or just look stupid. I had some of that fear when I pushed the button for last Wednesday’s article on authors and marketing. But my growing passion for the issue decided to override my fear of you readers thinking I just don’t get it. I was amazed at the conversation in the comments. Many of you shared my passion. Your thoughts encouraged me to think even more on the matter.

“I’m Not a Brand” focused on what I don’t like about marketing and promotions. But marketing and promotions are not bad in themselves. Indeed, they are necessary and helpful to the writer, as well as the reader. Clearly there are more authors just like me, struggling with how to go about this in a positive way. And equally as clear, there are many readers out there who want to hear about books they may be interested in without feeling like they are being hustled.

A major point of irritation that I mentioned was the language being used like “tribes” and “branding.” These aren’t just neutral marketing terms, they reveal something about how you view your readers and yourself. It’s dehumanizing. Another popular marketing term that makes me feel uncomfortable to say is the idea of “building a platform.” I do get the suggestion that it offers. Readers need to know that you exist. A publisher can market your book with all their might, but there is value to increasing your own publicity, that is, providing venues for readers to hear you, read your thoughts, “meet” you.

But building a platform makes it sound like I am constructing some self-raised stage to make everyone look at me. Writing is a very public activity. It insinuates interaction. I’m not depositing my thoughts down to you from some mountain top; I am trying to facilitate a place for discussion.

In the genre that I write, I suppose there is an idea of a platform from which authors  speak. I look at church denominations in that way. It is always helpful and sharpening to be clear about our positions, so that we can have honest, sharpening dialogue. But, this isn’t anything I am building. The foundation had already been laid.

That’s why I would like to look at marketing and promotions more like opening a door and extending an invitation. I’m am certainly no marketing expert, but I think I want some kind of a front porch approach. I am inviting readers to come and look at my work, but not as passive consumers. The nature of my writing asks for response and continued conversation.

I have no problem promoting myself when it comes to inviting someone to my house. In fact, I am pretty darn good at prevailing over them to come. Why? Because I passionately want their company, I’m happy to serve them for it, and I know that they will leave with their bellies and minds filled. And that is why blogging has been a blessing to me—I get to be hospitable with my work.

But while I am wrestling with hospitable marketing (how’s that for a clever marketing term?), I also want to mention the responsibility of the reader. If you want to know about good books, you have to look at reading as a public act. You have to share your thoughts with others. Do you really want to leave it up to CBD or your local, so-called Christian bookstore to tell you a top ten? You have to open some doors of invitation as well.

Amazon reviews have become pretty important to an author. Do you rely on them as a reader? Have you ever written one? I’ll admit, I hesitated for a long time. I hate the 5-star rating system for books because I wouldn’t rate my friends that way. But the reviews are helpful. At least consider spreading the news about your favorite books this way.

I am reprimanding myself here too. I have been a very unfaithful reader for Goodreads. Seriously, I did the initial sign-up, and can’t even remember my password. Minus 100 points for me.

But I get like 800 points for my book review club. Me and my fellow local readers get together to give book reviews on something we have read in the last month. It’s so much fun, and a great way to learn about books, as well as soak in what you have just read a little better.

I’ve also argued the case that with the increase of cyber-shopping for books, we need a new kind of librarian–someone willing to help match readers to their books.

What about you? How do you learn about good books that may interest you? Has there been a particular form of marketing or publicity that resided with you as a reader? Is anyone lucky dipping in the bookstore still?

Posted in Cyber-Thinking, My Book , , , | 19 Comments »

Why Do I Care?

Written By: Aimee Byrd - Mar• 15•13

images-9Edward T. Welch, What Do You Think of Me? Why Do I Care? (New Growth Press, 2011)

Edward Welch cares way too much about what other people think about him.

No really, he does. He says so in his book. That’s why he wrote it. In fact, he found himself needing to go over and over again the principles of his book, When People Are Big and God is Small, that he has written a second time to an audience of 15-25 years of age.

I bought What Do You Think of Me? for the church library because I loved Welch’s book Blame It on the Brain, and thought this title sounded like an issue we all wrestle with. I remember grabbing it off the shelf last summer, thinking I would read it for myself while sitting in the sun (one of my all-time favorite combinations). Although I was agreeing with Welch, I couldn’t get into the book due to the target audience. Let’s face it, not only am I well over 25, I’m also well-read enough to need a stronger drink.

And then my 10-year–old daughter started getting sucked into 5th grade drama. The girls in her class are way more dramatic than I remember the girls being when my oldest was in 5th grade. Maybe it is because many of them have older sisters and are trying too hard to be older themselves. I don’t know. But my daughter is a pleaser. She wants everyone to get along and she gets tangled in the web of caring way too much about what other people think of her. At first I was thinking that her heart was just way too sweet for all this drama. But as she needed to handle conflict, my husband and I noticed the sinful tendencies rooted in that sugared heart. Zaidee shows some propensities to enable, and she falls apart when someone is upset with her.

That’s when I remembered Welch’s book. I’ve been reading it out loud to both of my daughters—an evening here, an evening there. For me, it’s been such a wonderful bonding time with my girls. I wish I could say the same for them. I have to force them to stop their more important activities to gather in my little Byrdies. But then we cuddle as I read, and the many questions in the book direct our conversations.

The chapters are super-short, making this book ideal for reading aloud to a younger audience. The principles in it are perfect for middle/high school students. The three basic questions that direct the book are:

Who is God?

Who am I?

Who are they?

The first section of What Do You Think of Me? explains our propensity to worship. The problem is that we are worshipping the wrong thing. Welch explains how we seem to be like empty cups, looking to other people to be filled. Encouraging us to take a good look at ourselves, we learn how we are motivated by fear, and how we are controlled by what we fear. He then introduces that right kind of fear for God. Welch has a great way of pointing to Scripture and showing how this matters to the self-consumed, younger crowd. He asks challenging questions along the way. Ultimately, he shows that “When you trust in Jesus rather than your reputation, and you follow him in love and obedience, even when it hurts, then you are truly worshipping” (44).

Welch then has a section for each one of the above questions. I find this format very helpful. With chapters that take the reader to God’s word, these three questions become a discernment tool to put your emotions in check. There’s some great one-liners in the book as well. To introduce the Who Is God? Section, he advises, “When you want to find out how you’ve gotten into a problem, it’s best to start by looking at yourself. When you want to find a way out, it’s best to start with God” (61). Isn’t that a great principle to memorize when it comes to counseling your kids? Or yourself?

And that’s just it. The book was written for too young of an audience for me to stomach reading on my own. But I love reading it with my girls (and a curious 8-year-old boy building with Legos nearby). They act annoyed when I summons them for “reading time,” but 30 seconds into it they are interrupting me with examples.

I’m not going to kid myself or you by thinking Zaidee is now going to be the master of 5th grade drama. But now she has a toolbox of biblical principles to unscrew each situation with. And since I read it with her, I have some familiar terms and questions I can remind her with in counsel. This will be ongoing, and Welch’s three questions serve as a great guide for us to navigate through our relationships with God and one another.

One more quick note. Like I said, the book is written for a 15-25 year-old audience. There are some references to sex in the book, so I do not want to advise any of my readers to go ahead and read this to your 11-year-old without that disclaimer. But, I will say that I think it is better fitted for ages 11-17. And after reading it with the girls, I am looking forward to getting When People Are Big and God is Small For myself.

Posted in Book Reviews, Parenting , , , , | 8 Comments »

I’m Not a Brand

Written By: Aimee Byrd - Mar• 13•13

images-6So I wrote a book. Amazingly, I found someone who wants to publish it. Someone good. But I’m finding that authors these days need to be a lot more than good writers.

Some people say, “I don’t care if my book isn’t a ‘best seller.’ If it really helps one person to know the Lord better, it will be worth it.” That’s not me. I’ve spent way too much valuable time on this project to settle for one better life. My goals are bigger. I want women to get passionate about theology. A lot of women. I want to improve the quality of our conversations. I want to facilitate an avenue for mentoring to blossom in our churches from high school age all the way to 93-year-old Buella. I want to help equip women—more than one. Hopefully the Lord will bless my work.

If you want to get your book out there, marketing is essential. So I’ve recently began “following” a few people on Twitter that write about how authors can better use social media to communicate their work to a broader audience. They have blue checks next to their names, so they must be pretty important. Some of them have “difference maker” on their profile, or “NY Times best seller.” I have to tell you that some of their vocabulary creeps me out.

I’m sure their methods are beneficial. But after reading a handful of articles, I come away feeling cheapened. I mean, how would you feel as a reader of my blog if you knew that I read an article yesterday referring to my readers as my “tribe”? In one word, you’ve been reduced from a free-thinking, human being to someone to manipulate. Sure, I have my favorite authors, but I don’t want to be in anyone’s tribe.

Another article encouraged me to have a comprehensive brand strategy. All the sudden, I also feel less than a thinking human being with worth, and more like a victim of the infamous “hot” or “not” site. I’m not a pair of shoes, I’m an author. Sure, people are buying more than my book. When I buy a new workout DVD, the trainer’s personality makes a difference in my workout. Same with writers. But we still have to be careful about making the person the product.

And then there’s the language about leadership. Many of my blog readers are also bloggers, writers, or leaders in their church. As leaders of different sorts, honesty is important. No one wants a huckster for a leader. So I was taken aback when I read these two sentences next to one another:

While leadership and marketing are both about influence, leadership is influence without self-interest. This is what makes leadership the most powerful kind of marketing possible.

How contradictory is that? The article ended with this question:

How do you see leadership changing in this new era?

According to this article, I would say it’s becoming a manipulative marketing tool instead of a positive influence.

So when these social media advisors tell me to indiscriminately go fishing for Twitter followers and Facebook fans, not to bother moderating any comments on my blog, and treat my website as a writing lab, I don’t want to be in their tribe. It just makes me feel desperate. Especially when the same article ends with, “be authentic, they can smell a phony a mile away!”  I do believe that last line.

I don’t want to question the motives of these consultants, I just feel like social media may be confusing the people with the machine a bit. I think part of the answer is in the Jerry McGuire mission statement:

And now we get to the answer that Dicky Fox knew years ago. The answer is fewer clients. Less dancing. More truth. We must crack open the tightly clenched fist of commerce and give a little back for the greater good. Eventually revenues will be the same, and that goodness will be infectious. We will have taken our number oneness and turned it into something greater. And eventually smaller will become bigger, in every way, and especially in our hearts.
Forget the dance.
Focus.
Learn who these people are. That is the stuff of your relationship. That is what will matter. It is inevitable, at our current size, to keep many athletes from leaving anyway. People always respond best to personal attention, it is the simplest and easiest truth to forget.

It also reminds me of a C.S. Lewis essay called The Inner Ring. If we are striving to be in a certain ring, we are missing the point. But if we are passionately pursuing the ways to use our gifts and share them with others, we will find ourselves already in a circle with like-minded people.

So we need to be discerning about what we are marketing and who we are marketing to. I am a person, not a brand. I am marketing my book, even more so, the thoughts in my book. And my readers are also people whom I care about. I am serving them, not the other way around. You are more than a tribe. Circles form, but they are interactive. They organically move, expand and contract. But they don’t need to be fear-based.

So I respectfully ask the marketing gurus to quit trying to draw the circle for us.
Posted in Cyber-Thinking , , , , | 33 Comments »

The Wine Kitchen

Written By: Aimee Byrd - Mar• 11•13

Right after last week’s sermon, my good friend, Dana Tuttle, and I were reflecting on something our pastor said. Dana was making such great connections, I suggested that she write an article for my blog. I’m so glad she did! In between her mom of 6-year-old-twin-boys gig, Dana delivered the goods. I introduce to you Dana’s first blog appearance as a housewife theologian:

images-4Recently, I enjoyed a great dining experience with family and friends at The Wine Kitchen in Frederick, Maryland. We joined two families together, along with friends, to celebrate a birthday. As the food was served and the wine was poured in this comfortable atmosphere, we began to relax, eat, drink and share.

Before long, we were all tasting each other’s meal choices, and sipping different wines.  Arms were crossing, forks were stabbing and lots of  “yum” noises were being made from one end of the table to the other. We were becoming family and as the mother of the birthday girl said, “There was love all around the table.”

The Wine Kitchen did not disappoint. Just as they claimed on their website, “We have always believed the most comfortable and inviting room in the house is the kitchen. We also notice all good parties inevitably end up in the kitchen. So we invite you to visit our kitchen, to enjoy our comforting hospitality, food, and wine. We have created a relaxed, inviting place for friends and family to gather and explore the world of food and wine with us.” And that is exactly what we experienced that evening!

Rarely after a meal at a restaurant do I wake up the next day and think about how good the bite of steak was, or how enjoyable my glass of red wine was, or the Riesling that had a hint of honey and flowers, but it was all that I could think about! I continued to savor all the flavors in my mind as I made my way to church that morning. I was looking forward to the service that would conclude with Christ’s invitation to his table to share a meal and wine with him among my family of fellow believers.

I was unaware of how my pastor’s message would connect all the thoughts in my head and my experience at dinner. He is currently preaching through the gospel of Mark and was at the place where Jesus conducted the Passover meal with his disciples the night before his arrest and crucifixion. My pastor briefly made some interesting observations about the Passover meal. He mentioned the 4 cups of wine that are customarily served during the meal and pointed out how Jesus, after instituting the New Covenant in his blood with the 3rd cup, then declares, “I will not drink again of the fruit of the vine until the day when I drink it new with you in my Father’s kingdom” (Mat. 26:29).

He makes the observation that Jesus did not drink the last cup and left the meal unfinished. He encouraged us to look forward to finishing the meal with him in his Kingdom. This really got my brain working and I was compelled to go straight home and do some more research on the custom of the 4 cups of wine in the Passover meal.

As a Jew, Jesus observed the Passover meal every year as required by the Law of Moses. From the time of Moses, Jews have celebrated the Passover in the same way. There is a set order of service that has varied little for more than 3,500 years.

The 4 cups of wine that are served during the meal represent the 4 promises of God in Exodus 6:6-7, “I will bring you out…I will deliver you…I will redeem you…I will acquire you…” They are called The Cup of Sanctification, The Cup of Plagues, The Cup of Redemption (this 3rd cup is where Jesus instituted the “new covenant in my blood”), and The Cup of Completion (this 4th cup is the one Jesus refused).

Yes, it is true that Christ’s redemptive work is finished (3rd cup), but there still remains a cup of completion when Jesus will drink again with us in The Wine Kitchen of his Heavenly Father. As Michael Horton says in his book, The Gospel Driven Life, “For on that day, Christ will be the Host rather than the Meal and we will eat and drink with him in an everlasting exchange of gifts.”

The theme of eating and drinking in the presence of God is continual from the garden in Genesis to the Marriage supper in Revelation. Christ himself proclaims, “The Son of man came eating and drinking…” (Matt.11:19). And Proverbs shouts of Wisdom’s invitation to her table, “Come eat of my bread and drink of the wine I have mixed. Leave your simple ways, and live and walk in the way of insight” (Proverbs 9:1-6).

A seat has been reserved for you! You have been invited to The Wine Kitchen of the Heavenly Father where his Son, Jesus Christ awaits to complete the meal with you. There is one more cup to drink. Will you drink it with him?

Posted in Guest Bloggers , , , , | 10 Comments »

The Christian Creed in One, Short Psalm, Part 2

Written By: Aimee Byrd - Mar• 08•13

In Part 1 of The Christian Creed, I shared how Puritan Edward Reynolds (1599-1676) referred to Psalm 110 as “’symbolum Davidicum’, the prophet David’s creed” (The Whole Works of Right Reverend Edward Reynolds, Vol. 2). This Psalm, containing a mere seven verses, reveals the Christian confession of faith. So in my last article, I briefly introduced a portion of Reynolds’ break down of David’s creed, as taught in Psalm 110, showing such doctrines as the trinity, the incarnation of Christ, the sufferings of Christ, his complete work and conquest over all his enemies, his resurrection, ascension, and intercession, the holy catholic church, and the communion of the saints. If you think that is a lot of doctrine coming out of 7 verses, today I will briefly continue with the rest of Reynolds’ findings:

 The Last Judgment and Day of His Wrath

Those who do not think it prudent to discuss the judgment and wrath of God would certainly not confess David’s creed. We see in the very first verse God the Father telling the Son, “Sit at my right hand, until I make your enemies your footstool.” Again, in verses 5 and 6, “The Lord is at your right hand; he will shatter kings on the day of his wrath. He will execute judgment among the nations, filling them with corpses; he will shatter chiefs over the wide earth.” Our God is just. Therefore the mercy that he shows toward his people is through the righteousness of Jesus Christ. The whole Old Testament sacrificial system alluded to the fact that a mediator between our holy God and sinful man is necessary. Sinful human beings cannot approach the Holy Father clothed in our own self-righteousness.

And although these sacrificial systems were done away with, we still need to be concerned about our approach to God. We still need a mediator. Jesus Christ is the mediator of a new covenant, his blood effectually atoning for our sin. All those who repent in faith have our sins covered by his blood, which effectually propitiated God’s wrath toward us over two thousand years ago on the cross. But those who have not repented and do not trust in Christ’s work over their own have a judgment day to come.

The Remission of Sins

Verse 4 of Psalm 110 identifies the Lord as a priest forever. The office of the priesthood offered sacrifices for the remission of sins. Jesus is our great high priest, as well as the sacrifice. This is a major theme in Hebrews. In fact, the writer to the Hebrews quotes Psalm 110:4 repeatedly as the crux of his argument that Jesus is the eternal high priest, appointed by the oath of God as mediator of a better covenant, ratified with better promises (5:6; 6:17,18, 20; 7:17, 21, 24, 28). That must be an important line, the pinnacle of the Psalm.

The writer to the Hebrews declares that not only is there a change in the priesthood, but a change in the law as well (7:12). In quoting Psalm 110:4, “The Lord has sworn and will not change his mind, You are a priest forever, after the order of Melchizedek,” the preacher is pointing to a greater appointment made by the oath of God who cannot lie. This is our confession of hope. It reveals the imperfection of the Levitical priesthood, which had to continually make sacrifices and replace each priest with a successor. Christ is a priest forever. The Levitical priests only pointed to the Great Priest to come.

Resurrection of the Body

This confession takes us back to the first verse of our Psalm. Our Lord is told to sit at the Father’s right hand until all of his enemies are put under his feet. In defending the resurrection, Paul quotes this verse while emphatically declaring that the last enemy to be destroyed is death (1 Cor. 15:25, 26). The writer of Hebrews quotes this verse as he explains how Christ’s sacrifice is perfect to save us to the uttermost (10:13).

But what always gets me about this verse is his remarkable patience and obedience. That word “until” is more loaded than it appears at first glance. After completing his work and ascending to the highest position at God’s right hand, we know that Christ our Victor can easily destroy all his enemies in a second. And yet, here we are over two thousand years later, as he waits according to his Father’s will to bring in every last believer.

Life Everlasting

Our last confession from David’s creed brings us back to the pinnacle of his Psalm, “The Lord has sworn and will not change his mind, You are a priest forever after the order of Melchizedek.” Of course, we immediately see the importance of the word forever. If the Son is a priest forever, then his intervention on our behalf is eternal. But, even more interesting and assuring is what this verse reveals about the basis of this eternal priesthood. Remember, this is the Father talking to the Son, and Christ is witnessing the Father swearing an oath on his very life that this will be. The preacher to the Hebrews focuses on this oath when quoting from Psalm 110:4 in chapter 7:17-28, concluding, “For the law appoints men in their weakness as high priests, but the word of the oath, which came later than the law, appoints a Son who has been made perfect forever” (v.28). This oath should give us complete assurance and confidence that God accepts Christ’s intercession on our behalf.

Picking up on this appointed priesthood, we read “Therefore he is the mediator of a new covenant, so that those who are called may receive the promised eternal inheritance, since a death has occurred that redeems them from the transgressions committed under the first covenant” (9:15). Our confidence to approach God and our hope to live with him eternally is not based on anything we can do to atone for our sin or to earn a relationship with him. It is fully reliant on the God who is faithful. Jesus Christ came to fulfill this oath that he agreed to with his Father to be our mediator in the covenant of grace. “This makes Jesus the guarantor of a better covenant” (7:22). Those who trust in him are delivered from the covenant of works. Instead of hearing, “Do this and you shall live,” we hear “All this Christ has done.”

 

Hopefully after reading a bit about these confessions contained in David’s creed, you will see why Psalm 110 is the most quoted Psalm in the New Testament. If you have ever struggled to articulate your faith, this may be a good place for you to begin. It would be quite beneficial to memorize the 7 verses of this Psalm, and then study the implications of the confessions it contains a little deeper. I believe the book of Hebrews is a great companion to this task, as recent scholarship suggests that Hebrews is a sermon interpreting this Psalm.

Posted in Knowing God , , , | 5 Comments »
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